Love Is Weakness
by thequeenqueen
Summary: "It had been only a few hours ago but it feels as if centuries had passed. The conversation about villains and happy endings, how he could have everything. They both could." Golden Queen. Contains a dialogue from S04E11. Special thanks to my dear Y, love you.


"What are you doing, Belle?"

"I know that you lied to me and that the dagger you gave me was a fake. I found the gauntlet in your shop and I thought that it would lead me to your real dagger. I know that you love power, Rumple, and I have loved you in spite of it. But I still hoped that maybe, just_ maybe_, it would lead me to myself. I hoped that you loved me more than you love power. Do you know where the gauntlet led me instead? Do you? It led me straight to_ Regina_."

"What did you say?" She takes him by surprise. He was sure the gauntlet would lead her to his real dagger.

"I have only one question: for how long?"

"For how long…What?"

"Oh, please, Rumple. For how long have you been sleeping with her?" Belle asks with tears in her eyes.

"I'm not sleeping with Regina. Belle, please, let's talk about it."

"Stay away from me. I don't believe you Rumple, it wouldn't have led me to Regina if you two..." She takes out the dagger. "You know what, you thought that I didn't know about the real dagger but I did. I knew all along. I knew where you hid it, so I took it with me today. Maybe it helps you to be honest with me."

Belle holds up the dagger and demands Rumple to answer if he is sleeping with Regina and for how long he has been doing it.

"I'm not sleeping with her, Belle. I never have. With or without the dagger, the answer stays the same. Now put it away, my love."

"Oh. Oh my god. You_ are_ telling the truth."

"I am."

"Wait... If you're not sleeping with Regina and the gauntlet still led me to her doorstep, that could mean only one thing. Of course. You _love _her."

"Belle, listen..."

"Love is weakness, Rumple. I should know that better than anyone." She lowers the dagger, tears streaming down her face.

"Please, Belle, let me explain."

"There's nothing to explain. You love her. Who am I to stand in your way? I wanted to be chosen, I don't want you to be with me out of obligation or out of guilt. The heart wants what the heart wants." She lets the dagger fall from her hands. "Don't come home before tomorrow morning, I'll be gone by then. You're a free man now, Rumple. I hope she is worth it."

"What do you mean "gone", Belle? Belle! Where are you going?"

She turns around to give him one last glance. "I'll go and see the world like I always wanted to. I'll go and take what you couldn't give me. Goodbye, Rumple."

* * *

><p>The sky above her house is already dark and full of stars when Regina sits down in her study, filling up her wine glass ‒ for the third time this night ‒ and thinking about the conversation she had with Rumple in her car. It had been only a few hours ago but it feels as if centuries had passed. The conversation about villains and happy endings, how he could have everything. They both could.<p>

"_If you don't think villains can get happy endings, just watch me take one. There's no author of my fate, no storybook with my destiny. I've been a villain a thousand times over and yet I'm about to get everything I desire. As unbelievable as it sounds, I want the same for you."_

_Rumple_. She subconsciously touches the finger that he had caressed earlier when, out of nowhere, the doorbell rings. She leaves the office and walks down the stairs to open the front door.

"Can I come in?"

"Rumple. What do you want?"

"I need to talk to you. I can come back later if you're working."

"I'm... not. Come in."

She leads him to the study and closes the door behind them. Regina walks to the window and looks out of it.

"I'm listening," she said, without moving away from the window.

"How are you?"

"What do you think?"

"Should I know how it feels like when someone you love abandons you?"

Regina turns around to face him. "Really, Rumple? You _really_ want to go there?"

"I'm just wondering how it felt like to watch Robin Hood go?" he asks.

"I don't want to talk about it, especially with you. _Why_ are you here?"

"I know that you were in love with the outlaw but, Regina, he chose Marian. He left you because he _chose_ his family."

"Thank you for rubbing salt in the wound. He didn't have a choice."

"Oh but we both know that this is not entirely true, is it now, dearie? It was either his dying wife or you and he chose her. But you know what? Maybe I could help you get over the pain."

Rumple's words make the Evil Queen in her overflow with anger. "You? Maybe _you_ could help me? The only thing you want is to see me miserable."

Regina turns around and steps closer to him. She steps out of her heels, rips open her blouse and tosses it away. She opens the zipper of her skirt, lets it fall and steps out of it. Rumple stands there totally paralyzed, looking at the mean smile on her face. It hurts him in ways he never thought possible. He never thought he'd be able to feel something like that. He never had, not for Milah, not for Cora, not even for Belle. Rumple thought that _he_ was the love of his life ‒ himself and his power, to be exact. Standing there, in front of a half naked Regina, he realized how wrong he had been.

She steps even closer and runs her hands over her own body. At the same time, he takes a step back, trying not to look at her.

"Well, Rumple. This is what you want, right? Isn't this the 'everything I desire' you mentioned in my car? You just can't resist, can you? The darkness in you wants to taste me. You want to drown me in the darkness and break me once again before you go and run away with your wife."

"Regina, I..."

She lets out a laugh and its icy sound makes Rumple shiver, even though the fireplace is slowly filling the room with warm air. There's nothing in this world that's quite as evil and cold as her laugh.

"What are you waiting for? Come and take it, you know you want to. Be a man for once in your life."

He is finally able to look at her and when he does, his eyes fill up with tears. Behind the mask full of pain and disappointment, he is still able to see the woman he once fell in love with.

Regina puts her hands behind her back to open her bra but he stops her by grabbing her violently by the hand.

"Stop it. What the hell are you doing?"

"You should know better than anyone, Rumple. You wanted to help? Go ahead, then, help yourself." She grabs him by the tie and pulls him closer, letting out a deep breath.

"You're drunk. Put your clothes back on, Regina."

He looks her right in the eyes and, finally, she sees it. The pain, the bitterness, the conflict building up inside of him. It takes her by surprise, it frightens her and a second later, she realizes what she has done. But Rumple has already turned away from her and is walking out of the study. She runs across the room, grabs her blouse from the floor and tries to put it on while running after him. Regina reaches him just before he gets the chance to open the front door.

"Wait!"

She hugs him from behind, puts her hands around him, grabbing his shirt with her long fingers, pressing her face to his neck and breathing in the smell of his skin. His whole body freezes, once again, he is just too afraid to move. Here he is, the Dark One, in the arms of his old apprentice, paralyzed by fear. Like the coward he has always been.

Regina's voice breaks. "Please, don't go."

"Regina, I'm not in the mood for your games. Let me go."

She doesn't.

"I asked you to stay."

He pushes her hands away and turns around to face her. Tears are now streaming down her face, the icy tone and mean smile from earlier have disappeared.

"I'm not drunk. See? I put on my blouse already." She laughs through the tears. This time the smile is weak and warm. "You wanted to talk. Let's talk."

Regina offers him her hand and he takes it. She guides him to the living room couch and takes off his jacket.

"Make yourself at home, I'll be right back."

Regina heads towards the bedroom and comes back ten minutes later without make-up, dressed in a dark blue dressing gown. She pours two glasses of whiskey, hands one of them to Rumple and sits next to him. Even though she's not in her underwear anymore, he thinks that he has never seen Regina in a more naked and vulnerable state.

"What did you want to talk about?"

"I'm really not good at this."

"Neither am I, Rumple. I only know what you have taught me, remember?"

"That's not true. You know so much more."

"I don't."

"Regina, you have _light magic_."

"Yeah, well, I didn't until lately and I'm not really sure what to do with it. You taught me everything I know. True, you have also done a lot to ruin my life. But I'm sure my light magic is not what you wanted to talk about."

Rumple hesitates for a second.

"I'm only telling you this cause I don't want you to find out from anyone else. Do you remember the gauntlet I took from Camelot? The one that's able to locate your greatest weakness."

"I do."

"Well, Belle found it in my shop. And... she used it to find out mine."

"Oh, Rumple. And it led her to your dagger? I'm sure she is mad at you."

"She is. But it didn't lead her to my dagger."

"I don't understand."

"Belle came to see you this morning, Regina, didn't she? I suppose she told you that she'll leave Storybrooke tomorrow morning."

She thought that Belle was supposed to leave with her husband. She was wrong. He doesn't even have to say anything else. Suddenly, it all becomes clear. Regina pulls away from him.

"Me? _I_ am your greatest weakness?"

"I only wanted you to know this because I don't need you wondering why Belle looked at you like she did. So now you know that it's not your fault." He puts his empty whiskey glass on the living room table and stands up. "I better leave."

"Where are you going?"

"I don't know. To the shop, probably. Belle told me not to go home tonight. I'll figure something out."

She takes his hand in hers and starts caressing his finger, just like he did to her in the car a few hours before.

"You can stay here, if you want to."

"Regina, you don't have to do this. You don't owe me anything, I'm not your master anymore."

Regina has never seen Rumple so broken. She leans in, not letting go of his hand, and whispers into his ear: "I know, it seems that I'm yours now." Finally, she lets go of his hand and hugs him.

"Regina, I did everything I could to love her. To love Belle. I really did."

"It's okay, one day she'll understand and forgive you."

"She won't. You don't have to lie to me to make me feel better."

"You're right, she won't. If she has any self-respect left, she won't."

"Who's rubbing salt in the wound now?" Rumple smiled sadly.

"You know perfectly well that you deserve it, you idiot. No one asked you to marry her if you didn't love her. Yes, you tried, but it wasn't enough."

"I never thought I'd say that out loud but I'm just not strong enough to stay away from you. I wanted to but I can't. You bring me to my knees, dearie."

Regina laughs. "So now it's my fault?"

"Of course."

Rumple looks into her eyes and she feels the familiar shiver run down her spine. The same shiver she has always felt when she is around Rumple. Regina never thought this day would come, she thought that one day she'd get over it and go on with her life and it had almost happened when she met Robin Hood but it seems that fate had other plans for her. _This stupid fairy with her tattoo nonsense_.

She had fallen in love with Rumple decades ago, it was her biggest secret. She never told anyone and sometimes she even managed to fool herself into thinking that it was just a fascination she felt for him. But that shiver was the one small thing that always brought her back to reality. To the realization that she was doomed to live all her life loving this man. She never thought he could feel the same for her.

Slowly, so painfully slowly, Regina leans in to touch his lips with hers. She puts her hands around his neck to pull him closer, to make him open up to her touch. Rumple is not sure that this isn't some kind of a joke. It seems too good to be true. How could someone like Regina want him? She could want the Dark One, the Mentor, of course, but he let his guard down and she still didn't back off, he showed her that he is vulnerable too and yet she didn't run. She wants it all – the Dark one, the Mentor, the imp, the cripple, the coward. She wants the human.

Regina caresses his face and runs her fingers through his hair as he closes his eyes.

"Regina..." he breathes.

"Let me in, Rumple. Let the walls down, let me in."

She presses herself against him and kisses his forehead. "You have no idea how many times I've dreamed of this."

"Regina, you were wrong earlier, it's not only the darkness in me that wants to taste you. It does – the ugly part of me wants to tear you apart without asking for your permission ‒ but the human in me wants _all_ of you. It wants what's _inside_ of you, not only the parts I can touch."

The walls are down. There's nothing left to hide. They have always been there for each other, one way or another. And they always will be.

He is certain now that she's not playing. And he takes over control. Rumple pushes her gently against the wall and devours her, the dark shade lighting up his eyes again. Regina surrenders completely, her legs are not able to hold her up anymore but Rumple does it for her. She rips open his shirt and runs her hands all over his chest, the buttons falling all over the floor. He opens the hems of her dressing gown and lets it fall down from her shoulders. Rumple can't believe that the woman he had dreamed of is standing there, between the wall and him, and that she is shaking and breathing so heavily that it frightens him.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

She forces her legs to take a few steps towards the couch, pulling him with her until they both fall on it. He climbs on top of her, running his fingers up and down her soft skin in disbelief, her body responding to his every touch. Regina reaches for his lower lip, sucking it between hers and leaving soft bites on it. Rumple reaches for his belt, hesitating for the last time.

"Last chance to change your mind, love."

"Shut up, or I'll make you regret that you ever said that."

* * *

><p>Later, when they are finally upstairs, lying side by side in Regina's bedroom, he dares to speak again.<p>

"Are you going to regret it in the morning when the darkness fades away?"

Regina pulls him closer again, looking him right in the eyes.

"I won't regret it, Rumple. Go ahead, use your magic gauntlet on me."

"Would it lead me to –"

She interrupts. "‒ yourself, yes."

"I haven't changed and I'm not going to, not ever. I am who I am, I'm not like you, I won't redeem myself. You need to know this cause love is weakness, Regina."

She takes his hand, interlacing his fingers with hers.

"I'm willing to take my chances," she smiles. "Tomorrow morning, the whole world is going to be ours. Maybe we can have everything after all."


End file.
